BACHELOR FLAT (1962)

 

In 1971, Tuesday Weld appeared on The Dick Cavett Show to plug her newest film, A SAFE PLACE, directed by Henry Jaglom. Cavett, in his usual way of letting loose with disarming questions and remarks, posed this to Miss Weld:

"By the way, can I get one thing out of the way with you? You're a superb actress, and over the years no one has ever been sure of that, because you've been in a bunch of bad movies."

Now, how's that for a conversation starter? One should always begin an evening with an actress by mentioning her bad movies.

Which brings us around to BACHELOR FLAT. This fluffy little romantic comedy was directed by Frank Tashlin. It was a reworking of his 1954 movie SUSAN SLEPT HERE, which starred Dick Powell and Debbie Reynolds. I've never seen the original, so I can't comment on it. But BACHELOR FLAT, like many so-called romantic comedies from the 1960's that I've been watching lately, contains very little romance and practically no "comedy" likely to induce actual laughter from anyone having to sit through it. It does have plenty of exaggerated characterizations, lots of physical gags, and a sort of leering sex-tease element going on. What I mean by leering sex-tease is the suggestive atmosphere that sex is a definite possibility, that several members of the cast are obsessed with it, and the viewers  are being programmed to expect it to happen at any second. However, this was 1962 and pre-Sexual Revolution, so at no time during the course of the film does any actual sex occur. So then, to recap: Very little romance, no comedy worth mentioning, and no sex. This begs the question: Why make such a film in the first place? For the answer, one would have to go to Hollywood and break into the archives at 20th Century-Fox. Good luck with that project. Quite possibly, the studio was trying to promote their young contract players Tuesday Weld and Richard Beymer. Miss Weld was still a real live teenager and one of the emerging sex kittens of the period, both onscreen and off. Beymer had starred in WEST SIDE STORY, the Best Picture of 1961. Both were considered hot properties in need of exposure and exploitation. What could be better than a leering sex-tease rom-com? 

Richard Beymer and Tuesday Weld

BACHELOR FLAT was also a vehicle for English comedian Terry-Thomas, who was starring in his first American film. He plays an anthropology professor named Bruce Patterson. His British charm and style somehow make him irresistible to every woman and girl on the campus. As we see during the first moments of the film, the female population has been driven mad with collective lust over the beleaguered professor. However, he is engaged to marry Helen Bushmill (Celeste Holm). While she is away traveling, Patterson is staying at her beach house. Also staying on the property, but in a small trailer, is law student Mike Polaski (Beymer), who is a good friend to the professor. Helen has neglected to tell Patterson that she has a seventeen-year-old daughter, Libby (Weld). Libby, in turn, knows nothing about Patterson. When she shows up unexpectedly at her mother's home, Libby, confused about the situation, assumes another name, Libby Smith, and identifies herself as a runaway juvenile delinquent. Patterson tries to navigate the situation while fending off the amorous attentions of several lovestruck women. Meanwhile, young Mike and Libby find themselves attracted to each other. As if the human interaction isn't enough to keep audiences at the edge of their seats, salivating with anticipation, Mike has a terminally cute dachshund who gets more screen time than Lassie ever got on television. 

And so, hilarity ensues. OK, not really. None of the goings-on are very funny. Apparently, Terry-Thomas was considered to be a major comic in his prime. As I see it, his only comedic gift was his rather unconventional face, accentuated by the wide gap in his front teeth. In this movie, he was required to be in a state of nervous agitation at all times. Combined with all of the slapstick he had to perform, the role must have been exhausting. The movie insinuates that Patterson is being helplessly drawn to the nubile Libby, but nothing ever happens between them. This is where the aforementioned leering sex-tease element comes into play. To be fair, this particular storyline remains no more than mildly suggestive. Libby's attractiveness is certainly being put on display for the male viewers, but she doesn't assume the role of femme fatale or resident Lolita, in spite of a sexy dance sequence. By the movie's end, all the confusions of identities are resolved, mother and daughter are happily reunited, Patterson and Helen are planning their wedding, and Libby and Mike have discovered the wonders of making out on the beach. And even the dachshund is reasonably content, despite the lack of any immediate romantic possibilities.

A happy ending in the rain. From left: Celeste Holm, Terry-Thomas, Tuesday Weld, Richard Beymer.

My main reason for seeking out this movie is, of course, Tuesday Weld, who is one of my favorite actresses. Dick Cavett had a point about some of the bad movies this gifted young lady found herself in. But even in something as silly as BACHELOR FLAT, Weld manages to transcend the material. In Libby's quieter moments, Weld displays her trademark qualities of wistfulness and vulnerability, qualities that grab the viewers' hearts. Richard Beymer's easy, understated masculine strength makes him a good match for Weld. The pleasure of seeing these two interact almost takes one's mind off the embarrassment of Terry-Thomas. As for Celeste Holm, I have no idea how she got herself involved in something like this. Apparently, her ALL ABOUT EVE money had finally run out. 

By the way, the dachshund has a first name: Jessica. And she gets star billing in the credits. After the reviews for this movie came out, she retired into obscurity.